Wednesday, May 6, 2009

the poopery...

I'm in a funk Interwebs. I know, it's either feast or famine on my blog, it's like I'm bi-polar, all leaping and screaming for joy one post, or bummed about something on another. And no, I'm not bi-polar... maybe I'm just a normal human being. With a wide range of human emotions.... hmmmm.

It's been a rough few weeks, at work and physically. I haven't mentioned it yet thanks to all the marathon hoopla, but my company went through another round of major layoffs, I lost a key person to me here at work, which has resulted in some stress. It has been harder on me than I expected, I miss her, my job is harder without her. I start to tear up knowing she isn't coming back. I guess you realize how much seeing someone every day at works means to you when they aren't there any longer. I've handled all the other layoffs like a champ, it was fine, but this one... this one has been rough. In addition, some people have been leaving here on their own, like my buddy Jerf the IT guy, he has been deployed to the Iraq.

This place gets lonelier every week... It's hard Interwebs... it's really hard. But I still have my job, and I am so thankful for that.

Anyway, I'm bummed because I've decided to heed wise advice and not run my all time favorite 10K on Saturday, the River Run. The more I think about it, the more sad I've become. But I've been through this before, the not being able to run a race bum-out and it will be fine. I'm still going (now I'm also going to be at the race to work for one of our stations sponsoring the event since there are no longer enough people left in the building to do certain jobs, so the rest of us are picking up the slack, it's the nature of the game) and cheering on all my friends and Ed who will be doing the race. I've been deemed the official race paparazzi, let the stalking begin. I'm looking at this as an opportunity to return the favor of everyone who cheered me on, now it's my turn. I think it will actually be really fun.

In other poopery news, I attempted to run for the first time since 'm' day last night. That was ugly on a stick. One and a half miles, never broke a 10:30... awesome. Although I did go to spin the night before, which kicked my butt. Plus it was raining on my run, and I took Milo and he wanted to pee on every living thing in sight. I love running in the rain, but when I got home from my pathetic attempt, Ed called and forgot he didn't have a car. So dripping wet and cold I had to drive to his office to pick him up.

Then we rushed to get ready to go to a Cinco de Mayo Birthday celebration for my friend Liz... which was quite entertaining (being the sober one is always MUCH more entertaining!), and oh there will be pictures with sombrero butting to come! But for now, just a random photo, I have to leave you with something. I was so cold though, that I decided it was a good idea to wear a turtleneck sweater, I am lame. And old. And tired.

*sabrina texting in the background, clearly she didn't want to be associated with us*

More poopery you ask? I went to my Dr. again this morning to address yet again my non-stop ear issue. It's like white noise... and please for the sake of my literal hypochondria problem, refrain from commenting on the ear issue. It's not healthy for me. Just know I'm starting yet another round of medication and if that doesn't do the trick, off to the specialist. I get nervous about these things... as most hypos do. And yes, it is a literal problem, not the casual ohhh I have swine flu joking i'm a hypochondriac thing... nope I am a real one.

Like in the way that my doctor knows, suggested some help for me, and is very understanding about it. This problem often leaves me in tears of frustration, it isn't a fun issue to have. Anyway, I just choose not to elaborate on it on my blog because it is an obnoxious and annoying personal problem. Much like feminine itch. BLECH. But I aim for pure honesty on my blog, and this is something I've been dealing with hardcore for the past two weeks.

Verbal diarrhea complete. Poopery indeed. I just needed to vent, these things usually go in my personal journal... so welcome to the mind of ME! You just got a sneak peek! LUCKY. Thanks for listening. I'm ready to go home, watch some AI on TiVo, eat an entire package of Milano's and hope tomorrow is a little easier.

I have more pictures and some happiness for you tomorrow no matter what.


californiameaghan said...

more reinforcement of the idea that we weer separated at birth: i have been dealing with majorly annoying ear issues too which may result in a referral to an ENT/ tubes in my ears (again , since i had them as a child).

its starting to get scary, all of the things we have in common.

Marlene said...

Sometimes it helps just to let it all out. I hope tomorrow is better!

As for the race, I have volunteered at a few this year when I couldn't run and you know what? It is so much fun! It's a great way to give back a little and you'll be surprised how much fun you can have.

teacherwoman said...

I agree with Marlene! Just let it all out and that makes a world of a difference.

I too have dealt with ENT issues since I was a baby, strugglying with tubes in my ears, excessive hearing loss... I should be wearing hearing aids but haven't forked over the money and can hear okay, just not clearly.

Tomorrow will be better chica. I know it!

RunningLaur said...

Every one else is right - sometimes it really just helps to get it all out there. I hope this can be your turning point onto happier things.

P.S. I think you look glorious in the turtle neck - so that's a plus!

Jerf_USMC said...

Im going to miss you dearly Nerd Corps Co-founder. Er kernt wert ter wer kern gert serm mer berf wern er return... wow, i couldnt do return lol

r.gibson said...

yesterday i ate an entire bag of mint myself.

and all i can say is, be glad you at least do work with other people. i've just got ally, and most of the time all she really contributes is actually smelling like a poopery.

(if people other than beka read this, ally is a dog, not a small human, although they'd probably smell just the same)

Anonymous said...

Everyone is entitled to a whine session. A bad day. Tears. Everyone meaning even you :)

Rookie on the Run said...

Too bad about the layoffs and missing your friend. That's got to be very stressful!

I love Milanos! I'm glad I'm not the only one who scarfs down crap when the day has been crappy.

I hope tomorrow is much better for you!

Ashley said...

:( Poor thing! You totally sound like me. From one hypochondriac to another, I totally get it. Let's see...I'm getting an ultrasound on my thyroid tomorrow and I'm seeing an othopedist next week for this "calf" issue, which is now suspected to be a stress fracture. :\ Life's a b!tch sometimes....and I really hate having that attitude.

Oh yeah, and my work is getting nasty now too. 2 of my good friends have been let go and the 1 that is left is literally one of my best friends. If he leaves, I will be crushed. My job role has also changed and I hate it, but in this economy, there's pretty much slim pickins for those looking for something better. So yeah....I'm just stuck.

I feel your pain. You should go cheer yourself up by looking at your "m" photos! Or...take a vicodin or something. ;) That always cheers me up.


Ace said...

This poopery too will pass.

Try some Maalox... :)

Chad in the AZ Desert said...

I know what you mean about an office getting lonelier and lonelier in my office, too. Found out my boss is leaving next week. Not fun times in the work world. I guess I'm just selfishly glad I still have my job.

aron said...

I am sorry you are in the poopery :( hang in there though, it will pass.

RunToFinish said...

you might have the post marathon blues, seriously look it up on the interwebs...we all get it. you ahve this amazing thing to work for and look forward to and to know you are accomplishing even when other things go poopy...well now that's over too.

sounds like maybe you just need to refocus... I have to tell you that the most amazing thing I have ever done for myself is committing to the daily gratitude journal. I mean after thinking of even just 5 things about your day that were good...well life feels better

we the interwebs are always here for you to vent!

thequestfor135 said...

Try smiling. It works for me. Best of luck.

IzzyBubbles said...

More proof the marathon is like a poopery, post-marathon poopery. Poopery all around.

FLYERS26 said...

I kinda had the blahs after running the Philly marathon.
It takes awhile, but you'll get past the "poopery".

Irish Cream said...

Ugh, I feel like there is poopery all over the place--and there just aren't enough milanos in the world to cure it all. But, trust me that it WILL get better. It just takes some time adjust. Hang in there, chica! :)

Emily said...

My absolute favorite thing about this picture is your friend texting in the background. There's one in every group, it's true! Hilarious. -e