Monday, November 30, 2009

a swift hard slap of humble on my face.

The Oklahoma City Marathon, I thought that was humbling. That amount of humbling is nothing compared to what I'm about to embark on. Me, the girl who has run 30 races over the past four years (no i don't mean that to sound cocky).... wait, I have something to say here.

RANDOM THOUGHT ALERT: yes, I know to some those 30 races consisting of multiple 5ks, 10ks, 10 milers, two milers, half marathons and only the one marathon,...well to some those are no big deal because there aren't multiple marathon notches in my running belt, which might cause some to think or act like I'm not a legitimate runner. I may do every other distance, but since I can't marathon that means I can't really run. But I am really proud of those 30 races, despite what distance they are. And no, I don't expect you to be as proud as I am, but the time and effort, the fun and friendships, the memories and lessons I have in all of them, I think that still legitimately qualifies me as being a runner. And a damn accomplished one.

Back on track. The big humble slap in the face. Me, non-marathoning runner girl since 2004, is starting from scratch. In about two weeks I will begin walking. Then in January I will start a beginning runners training program. Now that's some humble friends. Give me my 'piddly little a five hour marathon humble pie' over having to start over in running any day.

It's not what I would choose to do, because I know if I wanted to go and run 10 miles tomorrow, I could do it (again not being cocky, just honest). It might get ugly, and be painfully slow (not that i'm fast anyway) but it would get done. Instead. I will walk. Then I will run/walk. Then I will run. And hope this approach does the trick and keeps me healthy. One thing is definite... through my physical therapy the last six weeks, my perspective on running has done a 180. And it's what I've needed for about three years now.

But dang it if I don't go out there and become the best damn walker and beginning runner anyone has ever seen. I may have new perspective, but I still have a hell of a lot of determination. And clearly no shame.

So cheers to starting over. Washing the slate clean and starting fresh in 2010. With fresh new legs and fresh new perspective and fresh new moral support. I'm just thankful I have some people behind me telling me I can run, and believe I have the ability to run fast, and teaching me to believe that myself. Even if it isn't in a marathon. Running doesn't define me. But I sure am excited to see what it has in store for me in 2010.

15 comments:

rachel said...

AMEN! bottom line; i think you're absolutely amazing.

RunningLaur said...

You are 100% a runner. And you're going to be an even more fantastic runner, because running isn't just about racing really fast or really far, it's about your hard work, dedication, and experience. Good luck!

onelittletrigirl said...

Yeah, F all that dude- you are totally a runner. You run, that makes your a runner. Period. Don't make me travel to the middle of wherever you live all the way from NJ to knock some sense into you! You know better. :)

Casey said...

way to go! i will be restarting w/ you in december, too!

IzzyBubbles said...

I agree with onelittletrigirl, but I don't have to drive all the way from Jersey to knock some sense into you! Aww, look who got me back to reading blogs.

Rookie on the Run said...

I had to start over, too. I still feel like a new runner (runner/walker)! It's tough and makes me want to take the "marathoner" license plate frame off my car.

You will be so glad you're doing this when you can run injury-free! With your determination, you will be successful!

Marlene said...

Every one of those races counts for a darn LOT and all of your experience will help you build up again. Here's to a fresh start!!

RunnuRMark said...

I sure hope that doesn't leave a mark on your face...humble can be kind of hard.
Damn...30 races is way more than I've done! You're an ass-kicker in my book. I'm looking forward to following your strong, but gradual return to running!!

Morgan said...

You gotta do what's best for you honey and we all support you 100% because we want you to run whether it be fast, slow or otherwise! Congrats on starting over and doing things the right way for you! You will be a better runner because of it!

Mel -Tall Mom on the Run said...

Love it!!

You know what I learned when I got injured my senior year in Basketball?? That Basketball was not everything and to appreciate it for what it was, a PART of my life.

OK who in the heck would discredit 30 races?? HELLO!! 30 races, regardless of the distance that is a Hell-of-a Stat.. Hugs to racing regardless of the distance.

Thanks for stopping in, have been missing you!!

Oh and there is a Bag giveaway, not sure if you say that.. it is pretty darn cool..

Santa hat? Hmmmm, Maybe a picture of me in a Santa hat..that would be good..

I thought you would appreciate my graphic, I am getting better...LOL!!

RunToTheFinish said...

it's so hard to take the smart path over the ...well ego path honestly for most of us. Enjoy the whole process, just think you get to reach of those milestones again and remember how proud that made you feel

J said...

Starting over can be the best part. It may be slow and hard but it will be fun! And hopefully this will help you to stay injury free!!

teacherwoman said...

Great post. You are a rockstar!

Mel-2nd Chances said...

you are awesome! Looking forward to watching your journey towards the next marathon... runner! :D

Irish Cream said...

1) I am proud of you and happen to think you are an amazing runner. 2) You are also the smartest runner I know. How many of us can say we would do the smart thing were we in your position? I'd be willing to bet that it's not many. So kudos to you, girl. You are seriously incredible . . . and I am keeping my fingers crossed that this fresh start is just what you need! HUGS to you! :)